"Paved Intentions"

This poem was inspired by a particular man but not for him... enjoy ;-)

"Paved Intentions"

I felt him in my bones

The very first time we met

When I smelled his cologne

And my heartbeat against his chest

We have so much in common

Damn, he's the man of my dreams

But I'll remain a skeptic

Until I get behind his scenes

The more of him that I desire

The more I fall away

I keep hoping he'll push through

And demand to me he stay

Tell me not to sabotage

And love him day by day

It's fate that just made our bed

And I'd be foolosh not to lay

But I want real passion, Honey

So please don't you hide it

Every day you put out the fire

Now why won't you light it?

"Gmail"

"Gmail"

I'm so bored sitting here all day

Nothin to do, got nothin to say

I sit alone and write this poem

In a sweet lil house that's not my home

I bounce around, I'm so unstable

And so unwillingly I carry this label

At Tif's today is where I spy

She has no liquor! Her cabinet is dry! ;(

I'll be on I.M. gmail all day

Talkin to Tif, Michelle, and Zayne

Our converstaions I hold so close

But not as much as a strong Adios!

haha

"Princess Zayne"

"Princess Zayne"

She just can't get it right today

While she sits and waits for her bouquet

She goes around kissing all these frogs

To watch them only turn to dogs

Some say her standards are too high

Then they never met her last crazy guy

He was jobless, and drama, and a little extreme

Yet still he lives in all of her dreams

She said she doesn't need a formal black tie

She just doesn't want that greasy fry guy

He sees her the same and it'll happen again

These boys can't get passed this woman is a ten

I wish her heart shun through like her hair

Golden and true without worry of despair

Her intentions are pure and she's got the shine

I can't believe they're not all standing in line

She's a great confidant, a really good friend

And her partying skills you can only commend

Princess Zayne just wait, your prince will come

And when he does I will raise my rum...

"Here's to Her for she never gave up

I stand and applaud and raise my cup

Here's to him, too, for that sunset by sea

When he fell in love and got on one knee"

The End.

"Pretty Diamonds"

"Pretty Diamonds"

Oh pretty diamonds in the sky

You always tell me such sweet lies

I look at you when I want to see

That flawless diamond meant for me

Where is he? May I have a clue?

Where's the one to whom I'll be true?

Does he think of me or where we'll meet?

Will he keep looking until we're complete?

I want the one that'll leave me in a fever

Forget all my woes and make me a believer

A one night stand that lasts forever

Let's take a chance and pull the lever

How will I know when his face I see?

Will there be a sign? A big marquee?

These sceptics I must soon defeat

Before my heart is one and I retreat

Oh pretty diamonds way up there

Please send my great everlasting love affair

Oh yeah....

And it doesn't really matter, but the poems go in the order there were posted. That shows you more of what happened in what order, I guess. Kind of like a little story that way. lmao. Alright... I need to get off of here... lol

Late!

Ramblings of a Crazy Woman, Part II

Hey All,

Me again! So I have posted 30 poems for ya... I'm working on several more right now.... so when I get the chance I will post the rest. As none of you know, lol, I am working on a book. A fictional story that surrounds my poetry. I have found a publisher that works with new writers, so everntually I will be able to get my book published as well. Very exciting for me!!! Feel free to leave any comments and let me know what you think of my work. I can handle constructive critism. I would rather know the bad and better my work than just pray people will love it. I know I'm no Poe, but I can only dream after I die, even one piece makes it into the spotlight! lol

Thanks for reading! ttyl!

Poem: "PINK"

"PINK"

I’m just takin it one day by one day

A mile at a time, I’m walkin my life away

I’m tryin to help find this cancerous cure

Walkin with true hearts, golden and pure

How much money and time will you put down

When we’re gambling with innocent lives all around

It could be you, him, them, or she

Your best friend, or lover, your neighbor, or me

So let’s get together and put up a fight

Hands across America and let’s do what’s right

If everyone only gave just a penny a day

In only a month that’s over a million together we’ve raised

It doesn’t matter how little or how much you put in

We just want you on our team, we need you to win

Let’s show the ones that have yet to survive

The rest of their future we won’t let cancer deprive

It’s definitely true, only a miracle can save someone’s life

But YOU can be that miracle and show them there’s light!

Poem: "Happy"

"Happy"

Do I make you happy?

The way you make my eyes wanna shine?

Do I make you happy?

The way you make my heart wanna cry?

They're tears of joy fallin down from grace

When I'm with you, there's no better place

But now you're gone and I miss you

The rain won't stop, God, Please take me too!

Why'd you leave me?

Why did you have to go?

Don't you see me here?

I'm sittin all alone.

When you're lookin down,

What do you see?

My refelction in the window

Starrin back at me

Why'd you leave me?

Why did you have to go?

Don't you see me here?

I'm sittin all alone.

And do I make you happy?

The way you make my eyes wanna shine?

And do I make you happy?

The way you make my heart wanna cry?

Poem: "Utopia"

"Utopia"

Does it mean the same to me

That it means to you?

Is it your dreamland paradise?

Can these dreams come true?

Is it meeting your soulmate

Or finally achieving your MBA?

Maybe it is just staying sober

And taking it day by day

Is it a mood or a lifetime

Or only a wonderland?

Can it be Heaven on Earth?

Does it have to be free of the damned?

It is "The Promise Land",

According to Webster's definition

That's what we once called America,

Have we maintained this characterization?

"Fairytale-land" is one more synonym

If this is true, let's use Disney's example

Bitter stories with exuberant endings

The possibilities are prepetual and ample

Are we all living in our land of enchantment?

Is Utopia what we create and decide?

Can we have a miserable paradise

If that's how we live in our minds?

I've had so many hard times

But if you ask I want you to know

I only count the eminent in-betweens

I only live in the moments that glow!

You only have one life to live

So now you better decide

Are you living in your Utopia?

And is it what you visioned in your mind?

Poem: "Spirit of Nymphs"

"Spirit of Nymphs"

I met him at a party

This drunken alcoholic

He thought he had some game

Ha! If that’s what you call it

It was only one week later

I saw him again at a BAR

He wouldn’t drink!, said he was Mormon

Oh my God!, I never laughed so hard!

He said he doesn’t always practice

He’s the black sheep of his fam

And he’ll have premarital...

Of course he will, what a man!

Religion, O’Religion, this shit just makes me laugh

Make up your mind, whatever you are

And stop pushin that shit on MY ass!

Your next life is your next life

Can anyone remember their last?

Just savour the one you are in

Stop planning ahead and typecast

Answer my question and then I’ll do my thing

How do you know which is real?

Is it Catholic, or Budhist, or Muslim, or Jew?

And do you go by what you’re told or you feel?

You can’t answer, it’s cool, I’ll leave you alone

Just please respect my request...

Don’t come knockin on my door at 6am

Don’t you know us Athiest need beauty rest?!

And I won’t answer, I’ll ignore

But if I do I will say.....

I am with Spirit of Nymphs!

Now leave me alone, Go away!

Poem: "I Thee Wedd"

"I Thee Wedd"

I'll stand by your side

When the clouds are grey

I'll stand by your side

On the rainiest day

I'll lay down my pride

If it gets in the way

I'll lay down my pride

If it means you will stay

For the first time in my life

I'll be faithful and true

For the first time in my life

I'll mean "I love you"

I don't need to drink

And party all night

I don't need to drink

And miss you holding me tight

I never wanted kids

But you opened that door

I never wanted kids

And now I want four

Your heart sang to me slowly

And so softly you said

While your heart sang to me slowly

'With this ring, I thee wedd'

Poem: "Clear Blue"

"Clear Blue"

I’m spiraling down

My past is a blur

I can see clearly now

No more wrong turns

Can I get it right this time?

Do I have what it takes to win?

I’m gonna give it all up

Rip off my blind fold and walk in

Into my new life

So free of dissaster

I’m getting so close

I hear singing and laughter

Skies are blue

Grey clouds are gone

I’ll be there in no time

Just gotta man up and be strong

There’s a lot to do

No time to waste

I’m craving my new life

My bright future I taste

Poem: "No Compramise"

"No Compramise"

No more chillin,

Just sweatin, I’m stressin

I’m rainin down blood from my eyes

Gotta be the best, Superior to the rest

I only wanna touch the skies

I’m bettin high stakes, make no mistake

On eggshells walkin through these land mines

I gotta be strong if I’m gonna prove him wrong

His looks alone pierce my heart like dull knives

I gotta change my ways to see different days

There’s more to me than just some good times

I never hurt so much til he walked in

But best believe he’s sendin me good vibes

There’s depth to his stares, he actually cares

My past lovers from himself he divides

He’s only givin tough love, no baby gloves

This aint a phase, he’s really changin both our lives

He told me passion is only a distraction

Who cares about your heart or the size

Results and achievments are what they want

But these are just a few words for the wise

Now I’m livin in better days, true to my new ways

I’ve released all these bindes and cut these ties

Now I’m just chillin,

No more sweatin, no stressin

I’m not goin back, no compramise!

Poem: "My Knoose"

"My Knoose"

I haven’t been drinkin, or smokin, or clubbin

I’m givin it up but it’s not for nothin

I’m tradin it in and not for just another vice

From my own shadows I’ll break through and I’ll rise

Don’t tell me I can’t, it’s not in my vocabulary

I won’t stop tryin until the day you’re readin my obituary

I have so much to win and nothin to lose

If I don’t change now I’m just hangin my knoose

Right now they’re all better than me so I gotta compete

I’ll never settle just to get by, I’ll never be a coward and I’ll never retreat

I wanna see the day that I make my Mama cry

Just rain tears from her eyes, all out of pride

I keep doin what I do but it’s never enough

Not in his eyes, not even a look, he’s just givin up

More than anyone else I have to settle this score

I want them to see me at their level and as so much more

They are my sisters and like them I wanna be

But it’s a struggle just to try when you’re a whole other breed

I’ll give in a little and of myself show compramise

But I gotta stay true to find where the complete me lays

So here I go again, takin it step by step

But staying focused, persevering and determined, I won’t let up

Check back in with me again at this time next year

My goals will be achieved, my prestige and statue clear

Poem: "CASH"

"CASH"

At the home of the blues

With Johnnys where I sit

He taught me how to walk the line

He taught me how to spit

He lit my ring of fire

And made me crave some more

So I took my shot of cocaine

And I walked on out the door

To my home sweet hometown

We called it the Paradise City

Where the grass is bright green

And the girls are more than just pretty

All I ask for is your smile

I’m feelin every new sensation

While I live my life and let wild

I’m givin into every sweet tempation

’Cause you got me in this spiderweb

I’m wearin only black

Do me a favor, just leave a message

And if you’re lucky I’ll call back

But don’t stop tryin and leave me alone

Or I’ll be screamin of my plea

In front of a jury and judge

They’ll find me guily in the first degree

’Cause I can’t live without ya babe

No matter how much I pretend

But I can’t live with a single doubt

I gotta trust and believe before I let you in

I’m fallin for you like a child

So you gotta stand and be a man

Please keep me safe and don’t stray away

Ride these waves and hold my hand

Once we dry our feet of this wet tar

We’ll let go of our past and forget

I wanna live in our own love song

Let’s dance from sunrise to sunset!

Poem: "I Do"

"I Do"

It turns me on

To watch the needle make my body bleed

Fuck sugar and spice

I'm and S & M sex phene

I'm the devil's advocate

And I can't be tamed

I like to whisper dirty things

That make you feel ashamed

I have venom in my voice

And poison in my heart

There's nothin keepin me together

To tare me apart

I'm after your souls

And I'll take 'em one by one

Just try and escape boys

You make it twice the fun

I'll lick my lips then suck your dick

I like to please in every way

You'll be in soo much pain

And still sayin my name

At the end of the night

You'll be beggin me to stay

But now I got what I want

And I'm done with you

So get the fuck off your knees

And back to the dumb bitch that told you 'i do'

Poem: "Monogomy Myth"

"This Monogomy Myth"

He was shaking and trembling

As he leaned and kissed me

He was shaking and trembling

As he got on one knee

He pulled out this paper

He wrote a whole speach

What was I hearing

From this love sucking leach

He said I was the one

He wanted to spend his life with

But I don't believe in fairytales

And this monogomy myth

You only think you love me

Because I'm so honest with you

And my honesty will never change

Just like I'll never be true

Please don't try to fix us

When there's nothing here to solve

Don't taint us with your bullshit

Don't let my loveless bliss disolve

I'm just keepin it real

I want more than just you

Trust this is better

I want you to see others too

As long as you can handle it

You'll stay thee man of my life

And you can always come home

After her at thee end of the night

Poem: "Cholo"

"Cholo"

Dancin on this fool

I was gettin low low

When I looked across the room

I saw this sexy cholo

He was all up on this girl

But his body sayin no no

Until he looked at me

He was G walkin real slow

Put his hands on mine

My body's feelin his flow

Dancin so serene

We was goin toe ta toe

Feelin so sexy

Like a strippa gettin so low

He wants ta take me home

So I told my baby let's go

The way he kissed my neck

My heart was feelin like whoa

He put a spell on me

Now all I want is him yo

Poem: "One Night"

"One Night"

No more coke and hennessy

I'm just sippin on this mai tai

Chillin wit my girls

I'm checkin out this fly guy

He's workin up his nerve

But baby boy is so shy

Hold up here he comes

And damn girl he's so fine

Yep we're goin home now

Just him and I, he's all mine

I can't wait ta be alone now

He's got me feelin so high

And ya know it took him no time

Before he had me screamin "Oh My..."

He's tha best I eva had

And ya know this mama don't lie

He said he likes it rough

And yes ya know I do bite

Talk dirty to me daddy

And we'll keep this goin all night

This kittys been on lockdown

And her shit is feelin so tight

He's so smooth when he licks his lips

This thug has got me so right

Out tha door before I fall for him

And afta this ya know I just might

Poem: "Drunk Rock"

"Drunk Rock"

I love to party like I'm drunk rock,

Suckin' on a lollipop,

Lookin' for some rocker cock!

I like mohawks, muscles, and tattoos,

All I need is one night to show you what I can do!

We might last a lil longer and I'll want to be true,

But in the end, Baby, you'll just be singin' the blues.

I'll give you my whole heart when we're fresh and new,

But it's reality, Honey-Love, my heart's too big for just you!

Please believe that I really did care!

But you're BIG trippin' if you think I'll give you MY heart to tare!

Poem: "A Piece of Yours"

"A Piece of Yours"

Why did you trust me

I am the Devil's spawn

I begged you not to fall in love

I knew I'd hurt you all along

It was a matter of time

Before you saw the real me

Deep down inside I'm a huge mess

It's not a pretty scene

I don't know how you did it

You made ME fall in love

I don't even have a heart

I've been scorned from up above

You must have given me a piece of yours

I'm sorry you won't get it back

It's not the same anymore

It's damaged, corroded, it looks disgusting and black

You have a gift that can't be mistaken

You do it over and over

And you will again with my replacement.

Poem: "Cupid"

"Cupid"

What he is

Ain’t what he’ll be

Just wait a while

Baby then you’ll see

Hit hard times

And he will change

This tale is old

They’re all the same

Don’t fall in love

It’ll tare you apart

Protect yourself baby

Block Cupid’s dart

It’s full of poison

It will make you believe

The complete opposite

From even what you see

Poem: "With My"

"...with my..."

I'm playin with the all stars

Fuck the minor leagues

Forget about that dumb bitch

Come give me what I need

Get it together babe

You only get one chance

Just bring that bottle of whipped cream

Let's do that nasty dance

Pull out every trick

And do whatever it takes

Because tonight papi

I want you to make my earth shake

My eyes will start to water

And I might scream another name

Just know that you're the one

Who gave me pleasure with my pain

Poem: "My Wall"

"My Wall"

I'm so sick of hearin it

Everyone sais I put up a wall

Why bother tryin to achieve

Something real after what I saw?

Ya know there's no respect

Yeah they may love each other

What would you prefer

If you had to choose one or the other?

Love is only a mood

It's a fucking rollercoaster

Today it's all good

Tomorrow it's fucking over

So why set myself up

Just to let myself fall?

I guess I just don't get it

I need more experience to make this call

Could love be worth all this?

Is there gain with this pain?

The lack of respect?

This ludicrous shame?

To each his own

So you decide

But as for me...

I'm gonna let this one slide

Poem: "GQ"

"GQ"

He's got this GQ swagger

And I can't complain

I just wanna hit his sheets

And hear him say my name!

But it aint just that

Let me be on tha real

Imma lay down my pride

And let ya know how I feel

He's got this way with words

They call him the Extrodinare

His flow and his style

Don't even try ta compare

I got him on my mind

And I'm actin a fool

I'm losin tha grind

All a sudden I aint too cool

I've known him for so long

And neva really knew him at all

And what's crazy sexy cool

Is he might be tha one ta finally make me fall

I've neva been in love

Not in it's truest form

I neva even wanted it

But this fool has me trippin and torn

He's not really my type

But I can't name what he lacks

I feel like a high school girl

He just took me ten years back!

He's mysterious and funny

He's sexy and sweet

I know that he wants me

But he's too cool on tha street

He knows tha homie wants it

So he's gonna gimme up easy

He didn't count on losin me

Would make his shit queezy

He's already hooked and he don't know why

Now he's got that gangsta lean

AND some buttaflies

Poem: "Together Again"

"Together Again"

Even heaven is hell without you here!

Every minute is an hour 'til you draw near.

I can feel you getting closer as my eyes come together...

Everything's okay again, you say this time's forever!

We hug, we kiss, we wrestle and cuddle!

You lay down the towel to soak my teary puddle.

You bought your tuxedo and I found my white dress...

We are so happy again, our love is endless!

Right when I think things couldn't possibly be better...

I wake to the only thing I have left of you...

your old torn sweater.

Poem: "Over You"

"Over You"

When it came down to it

You were just another guy.

My eyes are dry now,

Not a tear, not a cry.

You've already been replaced hun,

In only a month I'm over you!

That month was three years ago...

The month after you became true.

I would laugh in your face

When you'd say you loved me.

I'm a heartless bitch, remember?

I never felt a thing!

When you left I was torn

And then I felt so mad!

Now I realize what that was...

It was my ego you hurt bad.

Don't you see I never cared?!

It was only my bed, with you, that I ever shared!

So go on with your new life

I hope you feel real happy and free...

Something I haven't felt in three years

Because you took that from me!

Poem: "A Conversation"

"A Conversation"

He showed me his heart

And said "Baby, come inside.

It may not be the warmest place

But I'll show you a good time."

I really wasn't ready

So I said "No thanks, Goodbye.

I need more time to pass

Before I take another ride."

He said "What's the matter, Baby?

Are you scared 'cause I don't bite."

I told him "I just broke up with Eric,

It's too soon, just doesn't feel right."

He said "Eric doesn't want you anymore

But don't do this out of spite.

Do it 'cause you want to, Baby,

I'll give you the time of your life!

I just wanna make you happy

Even if it's temporary.

It's those cryptic blues

That keep me so I can't stop starring!."

And he said "Eric never loved you.

Deep down inside you know I'm right.

Give me one real chance, Babe!

Let me be the one to tuck you in a night!"

Poem: "Mind Fucked Myself"

"Mind Fucked Myself"

I started out seeing him before my last was through

He was so great, but I wasn't ready. I didn't know what to do

I told him I didn't want a relationship and still he persists

We were inseperable. Every moment was bliss

I never had my independent freedom, but he was worth so much more!

I still needed to breathe alone. Instead we bought the keys to our first door

It was our home. I was so happy!I knew I had done right

And then crept in urges to be single. I guess I lost that fight

He was so in love and I would have been too...

If he gave me the time and space I first needed to do what I had to do

I cared for this man so much you must know!

I was at a crossroads.I was falling in love...

Still of my own time I could not let go

I cried for days after I cheated on him

I had to tell him of my lower than life sin

He left for days and that's when I realized

There went my whole life, I felt paralyzed

But our true love shun through and he came back

I was so happy! Our life seemed perfect after that!

But eventually he got too busy for me and that really hurt inside

We didn't do the things we use to. I wondered "where was his mind?"

So I did what the old me knew to do best

I partied and partied. I didn't even come home to rest

And I mind fucked myself until I lost my reality

And then once more I fucked up. I committed our relationship's fatality

I was so drunk I couldn't remember, but when I did was ashamed

How could I do something so stupid?! All I really wanted was my man's last name!

I had never lied to my love before, but this time how could I confess?

I couldn't risk losing him again! God, I made such a huge mess!

To pretend it never happened at all so hard I did try

I would make excuses Like "it was just a kiss" and " I didn't care about that guy"

Things became normal again. We were happy and true

I thanked God over and over! I was looking forward to saying "I Do"

Little did I know I wasn't off the hook just yet

My past came back to haunt me. It reared it's ugly head

Someone had recorded that kiss and knew my man's cell

They wanted to break us up and through via text they did tell

He sat on it for days while it boiled up inside

He waited to use it against me and when he did I died

Since he left me I haven't eaten at all. I just sit and I cry

The dream that "3 times a Charm" is what keeps me alive

It took me a while to know what I wanted and how to handle my hard times

He really is my last true love. I pray one day he will feel the same way inside

Poem: "His Parents"

"His Parents"

I am in love today

A love I hope will never fade

Men like Him, God created only a few

For sending him to me, I thank God and you two

You made this man I cherish so much

His hugs, his kisses, his warmth and his touch

He is my hero, my white knight, my best friend

Hearts broken by him, I don't know could ever mend

To be great parents YOU must know what it takes

You raised a great man, for that I say thanks

I love him more than words can describe

It's a wonderful feeling to glow from inside

To be perfect for him, I try so hard

He's the only man ever for I've held up no gaurd

It's your son that fights away my fears

It's your son that wipes away my tears

It's you son that makes my smile reach both of my ears

With your son, I want to spend all of my years

Now I think I've said all I wanted to say

Wait, one more thing and I'll go my way

I promise to give him my best, I want you to know

Because he was once your little boy that you helped grow.

Poem: "My Life"

"My Life"

I never was that girl that wanted to marry

After only two months I was already weary

Commitment for me was was too steep

I was known as the girl never to leap

The chances I've taken never really counted

I would rip out their hearts and on my wall they are mounted

I would cheat all the time, then be honest with them

With every new guy, out the door my soul went

Deep down inside I was really just scared

What if I found it, that feeling, that flair?
Open up and get hurt? It's a thought I couldn't bare

In a thousand little pieces my whole heart would tare

So I dated in double digits, never just one

If my daddy didn't love me, love was no fun

Until one day, in the room walked a man

Now that day is known as the day my life began

Could it be true. love at first sight really exsists?

Two days went by, we had our first kiss

I couldn't believe it, he made my heart beat so fast

And then before I knew it, my two months had past

It was now time for me to let go

Before any feelings could start to show

I didn't want to do it, I was his new biggest fan

But if my daddy couldn't love me, how could this man?

What changed my life happened the very next day

He caught me surprised, off gaurd and amazed

On a roadtrip to Arizona, he told his feelings to me

What he did next I couldn't believe

Just by holding my hand he set my heart free

I thought, what could he do with a kiss on the cheak?

Now it has been one year and a half

I remember my past lovers as I sit and look back

The longer I'm with Him, I appreciate them more

Because they were the path that led me straight to his door

For the first time in my life, I hold nothing back

I give it my all. I want it to last

You've heard the saying, a dozen a dime

This man is priceless. He is one of a kind

This feeling you gave me, nothing can out do

So I wrote this poem to show how much I love and appreciate you.

Poem: "My Girl"

"My Girl"

She can be loud and abnoxious

She's not graceful or kind

But to know her is to love her

That girl has got spine!

She's got a hidden heart of gold

And a wicked charm that'll blind

I'll take a bullet for that girl

I got her back and I know she's got mine!

We have a bond you can't break

Together we've gone too far

Through rapists, murderers, drugs, and cop cars

Now when things aren't what I thought that I knew

I just sit back and think about the things we use to do

We would hitch rides tryin ta get across state

We both left our homes, we were runnin away

There were dreams to discover and people to meet

We'd fend for ourselves and we slept on the street

I couldn't write a book

There are not enough lines

To tell you our stories

Of our good deeds and our crimes.

This is to my many lovers

And maybe more in time

You can give me your heart...

But you'll never take her place in mine!

Poem: "3 Words"

"3 Words"

It's only 3 little words that I want to hear.

But it's those 3 little words he seems to fear.

I know he will say them, I just have to wait.

But sometimes words come just one day too late.

I want to tell him, it's like a fire inside.

But I don't want to scare him, those three words I must hide.

Why can't he say them is what worries me most.

Could he love another? Maybe not over an old ghost?

I am not jealous or paranoid, only that answer I fear.

What keeps him from telling me what I've been so patient to hear?

That question is evil, it drives me insane.

It makes me think things. It becomes a big game.

I think he's only with me 'til she's back on the market.

I'll end up alone, burnt, and broken hearted.

Can it be real, if it's so hard for him to say?

Am I wasting more time with each new passing day?

This poem is about my boyfriend and I love him so.

Does he love me in return? I do not know.

If actions speak louder than words, I believe it is true.

God please help me,I really wish I knew.

But he is a very honest man, I want you to know.

I asked him once before. His answer was "no."

Could it be he grew up without love?

Could it be he could not tell what it was?

It started out we were just having fun.

If he ever left now, my heart would be done.

So I think, sometimes I should go.

If he ever will love me, I don't even know.

He told me, after us, to heal his heart would take many years.

Still from my eyes, out dropped a few tears.

I thought it meant he loved me, but the words never came.

Will he ever say them? Will he ever feel the same?

I am only 21, so this is okay for right now.

But how long do I have to wait for his heart to make that vow?

So I still think sometimes I should go.

How long can I wait for his heart to know?

Poem: "Game Over"

"Game Over"


I like to play so many games,

I'm just a little girl.

I'm a 21 year old woman,

Welcome to my naughty world!

So many men have tried to play

But no one ever wins.

Before you can even enter start

You must commit at least two sins!

They try so hard and sweat and tear,

But each one lands on trouble...

That's the box where they fall in love

And their hearts grow to double!

I'll feel a little bad

Because I'll know they'll be sad,

But it's not my fault.

They fucked up when they fell in love

And now their turn is over.

Their game is done.

Poem: "Invinsible"

"Invinsible"

I was with 8 of my best best friends

Friendships I knew would never ever end

We were all getting so drunk one school night

Stayin out past dark and that ole curfew street light

We were rebels without a cause

At our indifferences we’d stand with applaus

Our parents had no clue where we were

We were invinsible, life was ours to endure

All 8 chillin at our usual party tree

Up walked these men; One, two, there were three

They were tryin to punk us but at 15 I wasn’t scared

I stood up for my friends and gave them my best evil stare

Then one pushed me down and pulled out a gun

Said "Tonight, Sweetie, you and I are gonna have so much fun!"

At first it didn’t phase me, I knew my friends had my back

It was that night I found out true friendship I lacked

I’m sure he saw the moment my face went pale

Not knowing what would happen, would I live through this tale?

8 of my best friends watched while I screamed and I cried

Not one even ran for help, they left me to die

He ripped off my clothes as I screamed with my life

I think I cried more knowing I was watched as I’d fight

It was years before I could sleep without feeling his touch

How could 10 people stand by, 8 I knew and trusted so much?!

After what happened I don’t care what you say

I’ll never trust or believe you, I don’t care if you stay

I’m not the same person I was back then

If I had one wish I’d go back and start all over again

Sometimes I still cry because I envy the old me

My innocence, faith, my strong-will, and such purity

Even today I struggle to be that sweet girl once again

But sometimes I give up because it’s another battle I know I can’t win

Poem: "Four"

"Four"

If I wish on a star

Will my dream come true?

Will it end all my fantasies

And my dreams of you?

I hate that I love you

Your smile, your touch

I hate that I love you

When you hurt me so much

Without a care in the world

I use to trust and believe

And without a care in the world

You savagely made my heart bleed

He was my Zestful Zookeeper

And I was his Lovely Ladybug

We had a 'once in a lifetime'

We were undeniably in love

We shared the same spot

In our cozy bed at night

I slept right on top of him

I love how he'd hold me so tight

It was the lyrics to a song

That won me his heart

It was his innocence and humor

From him you couldn't tare me apart

Yes we had problems

Like all relationships do

But I swore I'd never see the day

When ours came so quickly unglued

We had a studio downtown

It was our sweet home together

It was also where I found him

With that girl, his secret lover!

I tried so hard to be strong

I tried to hold it together

But he maliciously murdered my soul

I see it in my mind just play over and over!

Now I'm scared to fall asleep

It's only of him that I dream

Maybe it's God's way of reminding me

Nothing is ever what it seems

.......So time has passed

And I tried to move on

Now it is him that is tortured

So he keeps singin his song

With lyrics of regret

He sings of sorrow and mourn

He left me heartless and cold

He left himself alone and self- scorned

So I look into the night's sky

And what do I see...

A beautiful falling star

I hope was meant for just me

If I wish on this star,

Will my dream come true

That I'll never dream again

And I'll stop loving you?

The Ramlings of a Crazy Woman, Part I

Hey All,

I am starting a new blog that I promise I am going to try to keep up with!! lol. We'll see if I can stay dedicated to this. lol. I originally wanted to create this for my poems, however, I think it will become much more than that.... meaning... just like everyone else's.... my ramblings of everything that goes on ;-)